2026-07-19
Dedicated to Ann - my wife of 44 years, my best friend, my sunshine, my soulmate, my companion.
My grandfather David William Fraser was born on the 16th of May 1866 in Scotland and in 1874 he sailed to Dunedin with his parents and siblings.
He lived in Oamaru (1890), Palmerston North (1890), Hawera (1896), Feilding (1911), and Lower Hutt (1919) until his death in 1955.
My father Cyril ('Snow') Fraser was born on the 30th September 1904 at (Hawera???)
World War Two: My mother told me that people living next to the railway tracks would put tin cans on top of their fence posts and the steam engine crews would throw coal at them as they travelled past. After the train had passed by, they'd pick up the coal. They would wave at the passenger trains and the passengers (usually military) would wave back, but one day they didn't wave back and then they noticed the heavily armed guards at the end of each coach. The train was carrying Japanese POWs. One day a little retaining wall for a flower garden at home crumbled a little and mum mentioned the fact in a letter to dad who was in an Army training camp at Featherston. He showed the letter to his Commanding Officer and claimed that the 'retaining wall' was far larger than it actually was, and that if he didn't repair it immediately the house was in imminent danger.
8th March 1949. I was born at Lower Hutt hospital.
Our home was at 1 Gurney Road, Belmont, Lower Hutt, which after a few years became 2 Gurney Road due to the houses being renumbered sometime in the 1950's. We were the first house up the road, hence number one, but then the council decreed odd numbers on the left, even on the right.
My earliest memories include:
• standing in our home watching a steam locomotive pulling a train on the nearby main railway line that used to run
up the western side of the Hutt valley north of
Melling railway station .
• sitting at my wee table (I must have been around 2 or 3) when my mother presented me with a beautiful ice cream she bought
from the local shop. (We didn't have a fridge, hot water or a telephone, and the toilet was a large bucket under a box with a toilet seat
in a shed.)
• watching the
Royal Tour of 1953/1954 crossing the old wooden Melling bridge.
My Aunty Gina was a Marching Girl and my mother took me to a big marching competition at Masterton. I spotted my aunt on the parade ground lined up with hundreds of other marching girls and proudly yelled out my latest achievement: "Aunty Gina, I can do it standing up just like Dad now."
Another memory of Aunty Gina is that she drove a sports car. She had to go to the doctor and take a urine sample with her. She used an empty gin bottle for the sample, and left it on the passenger seat of the car. On the way to the doctor she stopped at a shop, when she returned to the car the bottle was missing!
1955-ish to the end of 1961
25 October 1959 Three Near Disasters At Airport Opening In Wellington, New Zealand
We visited my Aunt Bessie who lived next to the beach at Petone, a popular destination especially during summer (149 The Esplanade I think?), and I still remember seeing the (damaged) Vulcan flying north over Newlands, the large white delta wing being quite distinctive. It crash landed at Ohakea.
Start of 1962 to the end of 1966
I also joined the 3rd Lower Hutt Boy Scouts in 1962, leaving when I joined the ATC in 1964.
One camp was at Whiteman's Valley (I think) and another was Moonshine Hill Road.
I remember a JOTA where we made a tower from our staffs and strung a wire aerial from it for a ham radio setup in a tent, the location being on the other side of the Hutt River from our Scout Hall.
When I reached the 5th Form at High School I joined the school's ATC squadron (there were also Army cadets) where we were shouted at, learned the basics of marching and more senior students did target shooting using .22 rifles on the school's own 25 yard range on a sports field next to a river stop bank. Roll calls were amusing because the cadet NCO calling out our names was a Flight Sergeant, (addressed as 'Flight') and alphabetically the cadet before me on the Roll Book was a guy called Paul Flight. I don't remember the name of the cadet before Paul so for entertainment purposes let's say his name was Fred Fergusson. So in a roll call, people's names are called out alphabetically and in this case they shout "FLIGHT" then the next name, etc. I'll use lowercase for the name and uppercase FLIGHT! for the shouted response: "... FLIGHT! fergusson FLIGHT! flight FLIGHT! fraser FLIGHT ..." There was always a few milliseconds gap after the third "flight" bounced back and forth as the universe recalibrated itself back to normality.
Subsequently I joined 2 Squadron ATC (Petone) which met at the drill hall at 2a Udy Street where we further developed our marching skills and were introduced to not only 303 rifles for drill purposes but got to shoot them on the Army ranges at Trentham, as well as the Bren Light Machinegun. Imagine nowadays in the 21st century, schoolkids being trained to fire machineguns!
2 Squadron also had a Link Trainer flight simulator, a small wind tunnel and many other gadgets and goodies that fuelled my interest in aviation and the RNZAF.
I went on two ATC camps, one near Reikorangi (approximate location) and one at RNZAF Dip Flat, and a gliding camp at Hood Aerodrome (Masterton) involving a Bergfalke glider.
Airman Cadet School, RNZAF Base Woodbourne a.k.a. ACS or Sprog School. Formerly named Boy Entrant School.
Memories of Tech Drawing classes immediately after morning parade on an icy winter parade square, pencils slipping out of numb frozen fingers.
My High School friend George Posselt also joined on the same course, but the bullying from Wayne B. was too much for him and he resigned after a few months. I never managed to find out anything about George in later years, perhaps he made a fresh start overseas? Perhaps not? I've often very deeply regretted not keeping in touch with him.
I had joined up to become an 'Air Radio' technician. On our first day at 2TTS, our instructor (Sergeant Ray Farrell) informed us that due to a shortage of radar technicians, we were now 'Radar Mechanics U/T' (U/T = 'under training'). In retrospect, that was excellent.
The Wigram Base Band included two unusual musicians: a very tall solidly built trumpet player and a short thin bass drummer.
The first couple of months were spent at RNZAF Base Ohakea getting some work experience, first with Blue Silk the Canberra bomber's doppler radar, and then the ground TACAN beacon, both being notable for using valve ('vacuum tube') technology. The Canberra was about to be replaced by the Skyhawk and the TACAN beacon was replaced some years later by a VORTAC beacon. The original site of the TACAN beacon was very approximately here in 1969.
RNZAF Base Wigram: 2TTS.
19 December 1975 while I was home on leave, my Father died. On the 22nd we had a service in a Lower Hutt church and then buried him at Taita Lawn Cemetery.
In 1981 I joined Taits which was at that time located at 42 Manchester Street in the old Kaiapoi Woollen Manufacturing Co. Ltd building.
In the mid-1980's Taits moved to 558 Wairakei Road.
Ann and I were married on 8th April 1982 (Easter) at Camp David, near Waipara. Lots of rain, an awning collecting a dangerous amount of water that Thaddeus Bircham dislodged by pushing a broom up from underneath it. The water retaliated by dumping itself over him.
Four couples were married that day, only two couples have remained together.
For our honeymoon we toured the West Coast of the South Island of New Zealand.
We rented an isolated house on a sheep farm off Ram Paddock Road, about 8km (5 miles) up the Waipara River from the SH1 bridge. Pine trees surrounding the house provided firewood in winter and broke the violent nor-wester summer winds which plagued the region.
John was born on 23rd February 1983 at Christchurch Women's Hospital.
Ann took John to the Waipara Playcentre and she soon began getting involved in running it.
It was located on the corner of Glenmark Drive and Johnston Street which Google maps now (2026) shows as being the New Life Church. Perhaps it has changed hands? Perhaps it is shared? Google maps streetview shows a lot of children's equipment still there.The owners of the house we were renting on Rampaddock Road (the Retallicks) wanted us to move out so we went house hunting, and purchased 21 Fergusson Avenue, Waipara, in late 1984 for $24,000.
My mother bought 107 Glenmark Drive, Waipara in the mid-1980's and lived there until declining health forced her to move to Bloomfield Court Retirement Home in Woodend in the early 1990's.
Sometime in the 2000-2010 period I think, Ann and I visited a cemetery adjacent to Lake Horowhenua, Levin, where some of her family members were buried. I remember going along a road with some unfenced houses on the left side, this is probably it.
In late 2015 Ann and I drove to the North Island via the Picton ferry with the intention of visiting our relatives in the lower half of the island. We planned to base ourselves in the Feilding Holiday Park not far from John and Sheree.
On the first day after arriving John and Sheree took us to Palmerston North to sightsee, and parked in the car park of a radiologist, which puzzled us. We soon found out why, as we saw our first grandchild (Zoe) on an ultrasound scanner screen, a perfect surprise! Our decision on the ferry to move to the North Island 'sometime soon' transformed to 'ASAP' and instead of visiting all of our relatives, we went house-hunting. Things happened amazingly quickly and a month later we had sold our Waipara home and moved into our new Feilding home at 19C Virginia Crescent.
When Ann and I moved to Feilding, John and Sheree were living with David and Natasha (Tash) Linn at 11 Attlee Place, Feilding.
As their family expanded, they purchased 30 Sherwill Street East, Feilding and then 19 East Street, Feilding and finally 34 Church Street, Feilding
There was a Christmas BBQ at the Sherwill Street house, the weather deteriorated. We were all gathered inside the large double garage with the main door open. We were watching distant lightning. Suddenly there was the very bright flash of a nearby lightning strike followed a second later by a tremendous peal of thunder. Sweet innocent little Zoe jumped and shouted "SHIT!!!".
Ann was told she needed to wear compression stockings. Usually people bought the rather dull and uninspiring skin coloured ones, but she discovered brightly coloured ones with cheerful patterns, even ones with Christmas themes. She received many comments about them.
Ann was diagnosed with Sleep Apnea and was supplied with a CPAP Machine by Palmerston North hospital which resulted in her sleeping far better and having far more energy during the day. And of course I was absolutely delighted that her very loud snoring had finally stopped!
Ann's kidney function slowly deteriorated. Around perhaps 2020 she was fitted with a
dialysis fistula in her left forearm in preparation
for dialysis.
I just learned this now (19 July 2026) from
https://my.clevelandclinic.org/health/procedures/dialysis-fistula:
"What is the life expectancy of a fistula patient?
If you’re on hemodialysis, the average life expectancy is between five and 10 years."
Well. I guess that explains the slow but relentless turnover of passengers on the Feilding Health Shuttle doing the dialysis run.
In the weeks leading up to her death, Ann very unusually:
(1) very specifically looked me in the eye and told me how much she appreciated my helping her with her problems.
(2) complained a few times about having to attend dialysis.
Relevant Telegram Messenger chats from Ann when she was at the Dialysis Unit on Monday, Wednesday and Friday afternoons:
Monday 2 February - "A doctor came and looked at that thing on my tummy. He said it looks infected and will need draining. He's pleased I am seeing the nurse tomorrow. Now I need a fresh bandage on it."
Monday 20 April - "They did a covid test and it was negative"
Monday 20 April - "Slightly better. I think the wash out is helping. Dialysis can do that for you"
Monday 20 April - "I haven't eaten anything yet but I might try a couple of biscuits when the Joe wagon comes. If that works then I might try tea when I get home 🏠"
Monday 20 April - "Blood test proved I have a minor infection. They want a urine sample"
Wednesday 22 April - "I haven't had lunch yet. Don't really feel like it"
Monday 4 May - "Dr has been and he thinks I have fluid in my lungs. He is going to arrange a chest X-ray"
Monday 4 May - "They brought down a mobile x-ray and took a picture of my chest. So that's done and I await the results"
Monday 11 May - "I got a message from the local pharmacy that they have pills there for me. Probably get them tomorrow"
(On 19 July while rummaging through our medicines bag I came across a partly used packet of 30mg Cinacalcet tablets dated 7 May.)
On Monday morning, 18 May 2026 at about 7am, my soulmate died. She had got out of bed before me and was sitting at her computer in the lounge. I got up and went into the lounge and asked how she felt as she'd not been feeling 100% recently and had mentioned possibly changing her insulin injection dosage slightly. I went to the toilet and while I was returning to the lounge she activated her St John's alarm pendant.
On Friday 22 May, after the funeral service at Beauchamp Funeral Home we buried her at the Feilding Cemetery.
26 June: Not handling things very well. Drove to Feilding Health Care to enquire about the free Grief Counselling that the vitamin B12 injection nurse told me about. As I was anticipating breaking down talking to the receptionist I wrote my question as a note on my smartphone and just handed her the phone. Had about an hour's counselling with Christine Murcott.
17 July: Second counselling appointment.
25 July: Launched a private Facebook group "Kiwi Grief Chat".
11 September: Third counselling appointment.